What If Time Isn’t the Problem?

(You can listen to the full podcast episode using the player above.)

So many women I work with tell me the same thing in different ways: "I just don’t have enough time."

Time feels tight, rushed, heavy. The to-do list never seems to end, and even when the “important” things get done, there’s very little energy left over to actually enjoy life.

But what if time itself isn’t the real issue?

What if the problem isn’t that you need more hours in the day, but that your energy, attention, and joy have slowly been drained out of the hours you already have?

This idea came into sharper focus for me after a recent conversation with Michelle Niemeyer, who teaches something she calls “time bending.” Not in a literal sense, of course, but in the way our experience of time can dramatically shift depending on how we’re living and what we’re prioritizing.

When life is lived in constant pressure mode, time feels rigid and unforgiving. Every minute is accounted for, yet nothing ever feels complete. When life includes moments of meaning, creativity, movement, and connection, time starts to feel more spacious. You don’t suddenly have more hours, but you often get more done, with less effort, and far less resentment.

That’s not an accident.

How Burnout Shrinks Our World

Burnout rarely happens all at once. It builds slowly, quietly, often under the guise of responsibility and productivity. We do what’s expected. We carry what needs to be carried. We meet the demands in front of us. And over time, pieces of ourselves get set aside because there’s “no room” for them anymore.

Creative outlets disappear. Movement becomes optional. Curiosity fades. Even joy can start to feel inefficient.

Eventually, many women reach a point where they feel disconnected from who they used to be. Life looks fine from the outside, but internally something feels flat, heavy, or chronically exhausting. In midlife especially, this often shows up alongside physical symptoms. Fatigue, inflammation, mood changes, digestive issues, autoimmune conditions, or a general sense that the body isn’t as resilient as it used to be.

I always say symptoms are signals, and very often they’re signaling that the nervous system has been living in overdrive for far too long.

When the body is constantly braced, time feels like an enemy. There’s never enough of it, and whatever you do have slips through your fingers.

Why Doing What You Love Isn’t a Luxury

One of the most important ideas behind time bending is this: spending time doing what lights you up isn’t indulgent, lazy, or irresponsible. It’s restorative. And restoration changes how time behaves.

When you engage in activities that genuinely energize you, your nervous system shifts. You move out of constant fight-or-flight and into a state where focus, creativity, and efficiency naturally increase. This is why people often say, “I got more done in two hours than I usually do all day.” They weren’t pushing harder. They were aligned.

This doesn’t mean quitting your job or restructuring your entire life. It means remembering who you are and what fuels you, then intentionally weaving small pieces of that back into your days.

For some people, it’s movement. For others, it’s creativity, mentoring, teaching, problem-solving, or being outdoors. Many women can trace these sparks back to childhood, long before life became about productivity and performance. The body remembers these things, even if the mind has forgotten them.

When those sparks are present, time expands. Not on the clock, but in how much life fits inside it.

Energy, Not Hours, Is the Real Currency

Another shift that changes everything is learning to work with your energy instead of fighting it. Different tasks require different kinds of focus, and most of us were never taught to notice that. We just try to push through everything the same way, regardless of how depleted we are.

When you begin paying attention to how you feel throughout the day, patterns emerge. Certain foods drain you. Certain tasks are better suited for the morning. Some activities restore you even though they take time. Others quietly exhaust you, even if they seem small.

This awareness alone can radically change how time feels. When you match the right tasks to the right energy state, work takes less effort and produces better results. That’s time bending in practice.

Taking Control Without Burning Everything Down

A common fear that comes up with these ideas is, "This sounds great, but I can’t change my life right now." And that’s true for many people. Responsibilities are real. Financial realities matter. Obligations don’t disappear overnight.

The good news is that time bending doesn’t require dramatic upheaval. It starts with perspective. With stepping back long enough to ask better questions.

• What actually matters here?

• What’s draining me unnecessarily?

• What’s helping, even a little?

• What could be simplified, delegated, delayed, or released?
  

So much of our overwhelm comes from carrying expectations that aren’t even ours anymore. Stories about what we “should” do, how things “must” be done, or what it means to be capable and responsible. When everything feels urgent, the brain loses the ability to prioritize. Writing things down, seeing them clearly, and choosing intentionally is often enough to reduce the mental load by half.

Time Bending Is Really About Agency

At its core, bending time is about taking your life back from autopilot. It’s about choosing how you spend your energy, not just reacting to what demands it. It’s about aligning your actions with your values, rather than living in constant catch-up mode.

When your days reflect what matters to you, time stops feeling like something you’re racing against. It becomes something you’re participating in.

And when joy, meaning, and intention are part of your life again, even in small ways, the body softens. Focus improves. Healing becomes more possible. Life feels more spacious, even when it’s still full.

If this conversation stirred something in you, I encourage you to listen to the full episode above and sit with what resonated. Not everything needs to change at once. Often, one small shift is enough to bend the entire direction of your days.

Living with intention doesn’t happen by accident. But it also doesn’t require perfection. Sometimes, it just starts with seeing time differently.

Lots of love,

Rachel

Click here to grab Michelle's Free Downloads (mentioned in the episode).

Next Steps

You don’t have to figure this out alone. Learn more or schedule a Clarity & Relief Session at RachelCartaRN.com/schedule.